lemonlimetree.org

I feel so lonely lately, even though for the most part, I’ve been surrounded by family.  I know why. It’s something that sucks but I have no control over. He’s mad at me now because I said something about it (I told him I didn’t want to talk about it, but he insisted), but I think he knows I’m right.

I had the worst day at GNC yet on Friday. I can’t believe I even made it through it. Crying on the phone to your boss (and that’s just one of the three times I burst into tears that day) is really embarrassing. Having your boss be the only person you can tell about your real problems is pretty pathetic.  Having a boss that listens and encourages you to talk to her and actually makes you feel better is neat. Having something to blame such a rough patch on? Priceless.

I learned a lesson the hard way. I’m just not built for it.

I had chicken schwarma today. I had a good excuse! I made Jesse tried it because she had no idea.  Of course she loved it!

 I have a three day weekend this week. I wanted to take Lucy to the river today but everyone in my house, including Lucy, is asleep. Aunt Tammy was supposed to go with me, but she’s probably not feeling up to it. I’ll probably send her a text message and find out. I’m tired of sitting at home. I cleaned the whole house except Seth’s room, the porch, some of the yard, and Gary’s Jeep. I’ve been productive enough today.

Tomorrow we’ll be having a barbecue and  Easter egg hunt at Aunt Tammy’s. Should be fun!

    Seth has a doctor’s appointment tomorrow to find out if he needs to see a therapist. I never really considered it, because I thought depression never showed until adolescence, but he’s got almost every sign of depression. He’s not running away or trying to kill himself, but he IS only five.

I told my aunt about it today, she told me that she wished she has gotten Josh into therapy when he was a child instead of calling it a phase and waiting for it to pass, which is what I’ve been doing. Josh is now diagnosed bi-polar and can’t deal with humans civilly. She can’t make him go to doctors because he’s an adult now. I’ll definitely take that as advice on the positive to what I’m doing.

My grandmother looked at me like I was crazy at first. She does that a lot. She said she doesn’t notice it at all, but Seth almost made her cry a couple of days ago telling her he doesn’t like her and then ignoring her.  That’s just not my baby.

I talked to the woman at GP today. After blowing me off for about 2 weeks, she finally told me that they’re not going to hire anyone. This is after she said I had the job. After I asked her if it depended on someone else, or if I had it and she said I had it. Yeah. Maybe I don’t want to work for you anyway, lady. I went to my interview at Venue Docket yesterday, and I’ll find out tomorrow if I have it. It’s something I’m actually pretty excited about.The interview made me so nervous, I could hardly answer their questions, though. I hope that doesn’t affect their decision.

This picture makes me feel a little better.

Camping was fun. I don’t really think it can be called camping, though. There was a fire. We were surrounded by trees. There were stories of big scary animals that might be lurking about. The one thing that was missing was the “roughing it” aspect, which I think is necessary for it to be called camping. The cabin was more comfortable than my house. It was all warm and toasty and there were people everywhere to talk to. The shower had AMAZING water pressure and the hot water lasted for more than 5 minutes. Nicole and Sonny were good hosts. There was coffee every morning. There was breakfast, too, but I just need coffee. And it was there.

I spent yesterday cleaning my kitchen. All justification for me spending the rest of the day painting the writing desk I got months ago. I should have taken a before and after picture, but I didn’t. It was wood with worn brown paint, and now it’s Shasta Daisy. To the untrained eye, it’s basically white. It’s flat wall paint, though. I will be having to get some kind of coating. I also painted this ugly chair I got from a garage sale. It looks WAY better. Like porch furniture for a beach house. It’s unimportant that I don’t even plan to keep this chair. As soon as I get a nice reading chair, it’s going.

Insomkneeacks is officially open. Just in time for my addiction change. Me, Gary, Tiffy(an old friend), Jesse (my cousin), and Robert(her boyfriend) went one night before it was opened. We had no idea. We couldn’t legally buy coffee. We played memory (and cheated) and I sort of learned to play chess from a guy named Don. If it’s true that everyone sucks their first time, then I’m right on track!

There are some new drawings on DA, and photos of the cabin weekend on flickr.

Also, Histerotica  has new posts. Three new posts. Not just one. They’re good.